Attention and focus
Struggling to get your child to listen to what you say?
At Mini Ps, I've had many parents ask how we engage the children in our classes - how we get them to listen and pay attention. It's a situation I'm sure you'll be familiar with.
You're desperately trying to get them out of the front door, but it's almost like they are on another planet! They don't seem to hear you at all. Of course it can get frustrating, and when you're under pressure there's always the temptation to raise your voice to break your child out of their reverie. This does work, but invariably you've hurt their feelings and they get upset. You then feel horrible for upsetting them, and are left wondering how on earth you can stop the cycle.
What's this all about?
At three, it's not necessarily that your child is being wilfully disobedient. In my experience, it's just that there are so many other interesting things happening all the time that it's a struggle to get them to focus on just one.
How should you handle it?
If your child isn't paying attention to what you say, firstly stop and consider why. Are there simply too many other distracting things going on around them? Wherever possible remove these distractions - whatever they might be - for example, if the television's on, turn it off. If they are engaged in play come down to their level, gain eye contact, then say whatever it is you need to.
If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear. - Winnie the Pooh
OK, so the piece of fluff is unlikely! But try to remain patient and calm. At Perform we use a variety of tricks to gain (and maintain) the children's attention.
Whispering works really well. It might sound counterintuitive - surely you're easier to ignore if you're whispering - but the truth is that whispers are intriguing. Secrets are whispered. Exciting plans are whispered.
Try it and see - you're child will invariably stop whatever it is they were doing in favour of listening to you - because they think that you're going to tell them something interesting.
At Perform, another trick we train our teachers to use is to talk as if you believe that the child can't hear you. If a class is being particularly chatty rather than resorting to endless rounds of "No talking please." We suggest saying something like "Wow, all the children are very talkative today. I'm guessing that they don't want to play this fabulous game I've made up. Oh well. I guess we just won't play it."
Again - you'll be surprised at how adding a little element of intrigue can get the attention of your little one. Suddenly whatever they were doing doesn't seem as interesting any more, and their focus and attention is on you instead.
Play & Pretend
Games like Simon says are great for developing listening skills, why not have a go at home?
